A wall along the border? I'm not falling for it.

Welcome back. Over the break I was talking to my guest, Larry, about this idea he has to . . . well, Larry, why don't you explain it my audience?

Sure, Mr. Hendrie, it's like I said. We take an' build a wall along the border . . .

Now, when you say "build a wall," you mean an actual wall? A construction of bricks and mortar?

Of course, Mr. Hendrie, that's the only way.

But wouldn't that cost billions? I mean, and take forever? And then what . . . let me give out my number so you can call in. It's 800 282-PHIL. Mike? Mike? That's my producer, Mike. Is that the right number? 800-282-PHIL? Mike's nodding his head. But that's odd, 'cause we haven't gotten a single call on this topic. Let me get back to Larry. So tell me more about this wall, 'cause it seems to me that you can go over a wall, or under it. Or for that matter through the wall. You know, a good hit wih a pickup bumper.

Well, Mr. Hendrie, what you've got to understand is that we'll build this wall high, so high, and so strong. Government's got billions, I mean what do they care?

Oh, we have a phone call. We finally have a phone call . . . but, that's odd. It's on the line that's . . .


Yes Mr. Bigg?

Knock it off, you're made.


You're made.

Are you sure?

Trust me. I've been managing this station long enough I know. For once listen to me. I am your boss after all.

No, Mr. Bigg, please, check the phone lines. Maybe they're just not wokring.

Listen to me, Hendrie. The audience figured it out. You finally crossed the line. Nobody's going to buy this one--it's just too stupid.

What do you mean?

The Y2K compatible VHS tapes? They fell for it. Checking people's grocery bags for magazines that insult your intelligence? Fine. They bought the concept of steroids in drinking water, you remember that? They called in about citizens serving time for Martha Stewart. But nobody--and I mean nobody--believes for a second that a human being that can dial a telephone actually thinks building a wall along the border is a solution. You lost 'em.

After all these years?

After all these years. You crossed the line. You blew it. I warned you, but no. You wouldn't listen. Had to get crazy on me. Had to go the extreme. Build an actual wall along the border. Hoo-wee! How nuts can you get?